A Sharing of A Loss of Parent

It takes a long time for me to decide what topic to be chose for my public speaking. Among the topic I chose were, “Stress Management and Book Street vs Smart Street, but these topics need further information to be discussed as we just given five minutes to discuss. Finally, after consider everything, why not I choose something that is really happened to me, so I can share with others on how to deal with “a loss of parent”.
At the beginning of the speech, it’s so hard for me to get started. Lots of emotions involved until I can’t speak. Slowly, I can control my emotions and the strength inside me comes slowly until I finished it! I can feel everyone looked at me and they feel impress on it. This is not about to gain sympathy, but, at least I can share with others on how I can deal a great deal in my life, a loss that can change a direction of one’s life. And a loss that can teach you on how to be strong enough to earn your life in the future.

A life to be Simplified!

Gawai Festival is just around the corner. But this year, I prepared nothing for it. It doesn’t mean anything for me as my mom just left me. I admit every festival, I depend much on my mom to prepare everything..Cakes, biscuits, tuak.. The only thing I know was to give some budget to her to spend for every festival. Seems like this year I have to take over her duty..so sad! Luckily I still have sisters to help me out

Actually I want to share some tips I get from an article I read; “Surviving Grief During the Holiday Season”, especially when you lost your parent and how to cope it during festival. It's so interesting to share with others (for those who experienced a loss of parent like me!)

No. 1: Offer yourself some grass
- remember, you are not alone! You still have love one around you
No.2: Be kind to yourself
- get rest and nourishment and don’t take on any more you can handle
No. 3: Ask for and accept help
- get other (your close one) to get through even sometimes you think you will trouble them
No. 4: Find support
- sharing with others, find people to talk with, then free up your mind


And last one, I like MOST:


REMEMBER THAT YOU WILL SURVIVE
- Life must go on, no matter how hard it is. Pray to God for to get the best part. It doesn’t mean the end of the world!

p/s: one day we will leave this world..we will leave our love one, our life, our dreams in this world..remember.. Life is so wonderful to regret...people come and go, you have to admit it!

A New Born

Every married partners will always wishing of having a great family, life with their own children. And the most precious gift from God is a child! How wonderful a life of a woman when she is able to bear a child!!
A big congrats to my cousin for her new born, the most cutest niece I ever had! (waiting for my turn then, but never knew when I'll have this opportunity to become a mother to my children..:)




How innocent she is! I love her so much & fall in love at the first sight!





Try to feed her..




******her aunt..always wanted to show off..hehehe****

I'm loving it!

****show off lok*****


Hang up with my best friend this afternoon really works! We did enjoy our shopping and the best thing was I was getting excited to have my first “inai”. Actually I love something like art to be painted on my body such as tattoo. It’s so unique and beautiful but I will never tattoo my body as nature of my job did not allow me to do so plus i don't think my future mother-in law will like this sort of tattoo on her daughter-in law body (hehehe..tak pasal2 kena reject, huh!) . Hence, I just have my “inai” to replace my tattoo (even I love tattoo so much)and the picture of butterfly is my selection!




Close up....


The picture of butterfly


The result..


and....how beautiful it is!!

Are some people just born positive thinkers??
......or is it their choice???..........


I'm trying to be positive person, try to believe in myself there always be a way out, at least! And I deserve that way, for what had happened to me!

Just Be Yourself

Someone people tend to be others, not herself because she wants everything is great about herself. But, bear in your mind.. Are you happy enough in your "fake" personality? You are trying to be others rather than be yourself. Sometimes you may camouflage your personality when circumstance need you to do so. Later you have to rectify your camouflage.
I have a friend, who have conflict in his personality. But i do love his personality much, he never pretended to be others. He is so honest and proud of himself. That's why i'm proud of him, because his sincerity to be himself!!
So, be what you wanted to be, because life can camouflage you if you are unable to be yourself!!

Lelengau..

Dua tiga hari ti udah tok ati endang berasai seilu-ilu..lelengau ngagai utai enda ulih dipeda mata, enda ulih dikayam pia ja. Nama meh daya, mina ulih ngenang aja meh. Lelengau ke pengerindu ti apin lenyau agai orang ti udah ninggal, lelengau ke pengerindu apai ti meruan disayau, lelengau agai utai ti enda ulih ditagang ati. Tang siti pengerindu ti majak nebak ati, pengerindu agai bala sebilik ti tinggal jauh di menua. Gerai ke enda sida, bakani meh enda pengerai sida..semua dikira magang.. asai ati ingin ja ka terebaai datai nyangkai ke menua, semadi diri empu bangat jauh.
Ati udah mutus, udah tok deka mulai kediri, netap diri di menua. Nadai agi utai dikira enggau dianti, mutus kediri mai ati ensiban, Ditu, di menua orang ukai penyangkai aku ti nyengala menyana. Ngelama tok udu ngaku diri empu tegal, tegal idup kediri, tang sekali udah rebah, endang enda alah agi angkat baka selama. Pait manis pengidup ditelan. Penguji ukai sekali dua, tang nimpa baka labuh ari tangga. Mina nanya diri empu aja, agi tegal ke enda baka selama. Cukup udah sekali dua, ngira diri empu aja sigi nadai guna, ka pen enda, baka tembuan pulai ke sarang meh..mi ati ti agi rawan...

Adamaya

Ader ker lelaki macam Adam zaman sekarang?? tipu la..tu sal aku x suke sangat ngan love story nie. buat kita admire benda yang tak akan ada & tak akan tiba.
kalau ader laki mcm Adam tuh..lama dah ku tinggalkan boyfriend ku, tak yah ku nak simpan lama-lama.
(tu pun kalu aku jumpa la..) sebab ku tak jumpa la aku statik & setia tahap cipan (cipan pun x setia mcm aku) sebab kalu aku cari yang lain, yang lain tu belum tentu baik punya macam bf aku yg ader nih! bukan aku nak yang baik macam malaikat, sbb tau mmg spesis macam tu dah pupus, sipi-sipi pun ok la..karut la cerita cinta nie..mana aku nk cari laki macam Adam ni???

Give me Strength!!

Today is my bad day. I’m too emotional with myself, hating everything around me. And the victims are people around me. I hate this kind of feeling, because I’m not that kind of person. I’m happy go lucky person, with my smiley face; I adore others to be my friends. But once I’m down, I lost my temper. What’s a big disaster to me? Feeling uncomfortable and insecure lately totally change my feeling, feeling fear of being alone. It’s hard to describe in words how torture this feeling. When someone you love seems to be far away, there is no point for you to keep this thing like before. Only one thing we can conclude, it makes you really mad at all. Need someone by your side in the crucial tie really hard we he is unable to do so. You have to reassemble everything on your own. You fall, you stand tall, and nobody can help you much BUT you. It is YOU; strength comes from deep in your heart.
And you will keep asking yourself, why God never answered me?? Why He neglected me, why He did this to me?? Isn’t I’m not enough to be His daughter?? These questions keep spinning in my mind, till I fed up and assume God will let me to be an independent child, seeking for her own solution with His little guide! A simple prayer just enough to keep me strong and still alive from doing that can ruin my life!